Because it's obligatory damnit! Aug 13, 2007 5:11PM PST

Net nerds think Resident Evil 5 is racist. There ya go. I have just proven I am not too far out of the loop. My take on it is that I can see why a game where you shoot mostly black people would seem iffy to non-gamers, but as we all know it's unintentional racism if any and I have yet to see it on a respectable broacast television station report it I think we can rule it out as an "issue". The funniest thing about this whole ordeal is that just about everyone is talking about the impact this game, set in Africa, will have on African Americans. Oh joy, liberal white guilt is using scientifically incorrect PC terms! OK, so Sharpton is African American and it'll have an effect on him if he finds out, but I thought it was an interesting observation anyway. On an unrelated note the commercials for Aliens in America are looking pretty promising. The Godfather of Green Bay~ ** Not great, not terrible, but not really good. Basically a comedian named Jo Keigan has to auditon at a Wisconsin bar for a shot at Leno while unwittingly being followed by a mafia hitman out for a big fish in a small pond (Green Bay), a mullet-wearing man who used to be really good at football and calls himself The Godfather of Green Bay and loves dancing the macarena; a song played so many times in this film it almost becomes as overplayed as "I Feel Good" by James Brown but in one sitting as opposed to spread across countless comedy previews like the latter. There are a couple chuckles, but that's it. The movie wants you to feel sorry for Keigan when he chokes, but in all honesty even though outside the stage he's a nicer guy than the assholes that do well on stage (chuckle #2 of 5, D-U-G DUG! failing miserably at a more serious approach after being talked out of his formerly low brow set) but in all honesty he kind of deserves it sometimes. It doesn't matter too much since the few laughs happen outside the comedy sets, and it's a sweet enough film that you don't completely hate it. It's still not worth going out of your way for though. Paradise Lost II~ **** A great documentary about how the death penalty and Deep South bible belt prejudice can go hand in hand in the worst possible ways ( go to wm3.org for more details) First of all a warning: If you have any faith in American law you may just lose it after seeing this. Three teens in the bible belt of West Memphis, Tenesee are arrested and sentenced to death for the heinous murders of 3 small children in a heavily wooded area. Proof? These teens' black t-shirts, Metallica CDs, and interest in Wicca. The film follows one of the kid's father who has volunteered to help the same people who would later direct Some Kind Of Monster, the Metallica documentary uncover some of the truths about life after a loved one's death. One small problem: almost every bit of evidence about this case points to this man himself including at least one eyewitness and an eerie scene in the film that shows us this man knows exactly how to get to the scene of the crime. Not only that, but the case against the three teens is riddled with horriblly unscientific reasoning including but not limited to: an "expert" on Satanic cults (the teens were accused on the basis they had performed acts in satanic ritual) who recieved his "degree" online playing a key role in testimony against the teens; one of the teens had an IQ below 60 and was questioned by police with no parental accompaniment, we hear the tapes and the teen changes his opinion of what he witnessed as the police press on. It's a horrid injustice that right now, in the real world these three teens are rotting away on death row when it's so painfully obvious who truly committed the crime. But of course the reason is clear: a former detective being interviewed at the end of the film says "If the police ever find out they are wrong about something, they will never admit to it". Paradise Lost II is a shocking view of the failures of our law.