Sunday, February 24, 2013

I heart Jebus Oct 11, 2008 12:39AM PST

So an Anthropology lecture involving voodoo dolls, ouja boards, St. Michael in a can (whom the prof. says smells like Pledge) and a death candle have inspired me to want a ouja board.

I don't want the death candle or voodoo doll cause I'm more or less sure their effects are purely coincidental. My professor was saying "they work, but only if you believe in them" or something to that effect; which I interpreted as they don't actually work worth a crap but the human mind, especially one with a belief in the supernatural, finds it difficult to accept a series of coincidences leading to a desired event are unrelated, possibly due to confirmation bias (when you look for reasons the items worked but not evidence of other influences, you tend to find the former).

I did think the death candle's usage is pretty cool though. You take someone's picture, put it under the candle and lighting the candle leads to their death. I wouldn't use one though, because either I don't believe in it, nothing happens, and I waste $1.25 (professor's quoted price from a store here in Nacogdoches where she also bought tortillas and had to ensure the cook it was purely for educational purposes), or it works too quickly and I become severely depressed over killing someone. Much more likely the former, and if it took a while to take effect I wouldn't blame the candle, but not worth risking the latter.

Claims of the Ouja board spelling out "Beelzebub" in response to "who's there?" are a bit harder to explain than the coincidential nature of the other two items.

Possible Explanations/Problems:

  • Some sort of magnetic device preset to say "Yes" "No" or spell out "Beelzebub" as its only answers. Problem with theory: Are there reports of numerous and accurrate spelled out answers?
  • What if the people of faith saw "Beelzebub" and just put it down right away? Problem: People like me who are just about certain there's a method to the madness and who's belief system doesn't limit their curiosity out of fear.
  • Wasn't this item popular in the 70s, when the delinquent Zeppelin worshipping teens fucking with Satan tools were likely very high? It was also mentioned in class that The Mars Volta buried some tracks of an album they wrote which seemed to cause bad juju. However, their drummer dying of a heroin overdose led to questioning how much heroin they were collectively doing, and when a drug is mixed with a belief something's awry it tends to enhance the problem. Problem with theory is of course, sober people.

Have any of you seen bizarrely accurate answers from a Ouja board fully spelled out? I don't want a Toys R Us one, I want an older model. I'm sure they've tinkered the newer ouja boards down considerably. Anyone know where to get a more evil ouja board?

Curiosity peaked, now back to studying for 3 exams next week.... coulda swore we just had our other tests.



Let's see if P&T convince me.

Edit2: I thought that triangle thing moved on its own? Pfft, some asshole probably just purposely spelled evil crap with their hands and others thought it was the power of the "spirit". Interest level lowering...

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